Pegging (sexual practice)

Pegging is a form of anal sex in which a person, commonly a woman using a strap-on dildo, penetrates another person’s anus.^[1] The term emerged in 2001 when it won a naming contest in Dan Savage’s Savage Love advice column and has since entered common usage. Though traditionally describing a woman penetrating a man, the definition has broadened to include participants of any gender or sexuality. Pegging is often associated with role-reversal and power-exchange dynamics, and is valued for both its physical stimulation such as prostate stimulation, and its capacity to subvert conventional gender norms.^[2][3][4] In recent years, it has gained visibility in popular media and sexual wellness discourse, reflecting shifting cultural attitudes toward sexual expression and intimacy.^[5][2]

A woman pegging a man in the doggy style position

Terminology

The neologism "pegging" was popularized by being the winning entry in a contest for the "Savage Love" sex advice column, held by Dan Savage in 2001. This was due to Savage observing that, after the act was popularized by the sex education movie Bend Over Boyfriend released in 1998, the concept lacked a common name, except for the phrase "Strap On Sex" used by Queen and her partner Robert in their national lecture series (Robert was the original Bend Over Boyfriend at the Good Vibrations lectures), and there was no dictionary entry for the act.^[6][7] Other words include "buggery" or "sodomy", but these refer to anal sex in general.^[7] "Strap-on sex" can be used for vaginal or anal intercourse between people of any gender using a strap-on, and is thus less precise than pegging.^[8] Some queer people prefer "strap-on sex" instead of "pegging" because they feel the latter is too hetero and cis centric.^[8]

Beckett and Miller use "pegger" and "peggee" to refer to the person penetrating and the person being penetrated; "top" and "bottom" are also used.^[8] According to Savage, while the classic definition involves a man being penetrated by a woman, the definition has expanded to include all genders and sexualities, as long as it involves anal sex with a strap-on.^[9]

Practice

Pegging is penetrative sex with a strap-on dildo, usually anal penetration. It is usually defined as a practice in which a woman penetrates the anus of a man.^[8][7] The woman uses a strap-on dildo, often a silicone phallus, attached with a harness, or a strapless dildo (that also penetrates the pegger).^[8] Lubricant is also used.^[8]

According to Tristan Taormino, gender and gender roles can play an important part in pegging.^[7] Pegging reverses traditional cisgender heterosexual gender roles in sexual practices: the man is penetrated by the woman, becoming passive rather than active.^[7] Sex researcher D. J. Williams states that, for many, pegging reflects BDSM themes of dominance and submission.^[10]

Evaluating queer opinions on "queering straightness", feminist author Jane Ward notes that "some have hypothesized that gender-subversive sex acts themselves, like pegging, could be a backdoor route to undermining men's patriarchal authority by redefining hetero-masculinity as receptive and vulnerable".^[11] Based on feminist and queer theories, Jonathan Branfman and Susan Stiritz argue in the American Journal of Sexuality Education that men's anal receptivity disrupts rigid norms of sex, gender, and sexuality, which they believe to be "social constructs".^[12] Queer-feminist Tristan Taormino attributes the acceptance of pegging to the queer community's influence in deconstructing gender boundaries.^[13]

There are varying views among feminists on the use of strap-ons in sex. Some feminists argue that strap-on sex imitates patriarchal structures and undermines feminist ideals, asserting that fantasies should align with ethical principles. They criticize feminists who engage in strap-on sex as hypocritical. However, others share these concerns but question whether politics should be brought into the bedroom, while some oppose the notion that strap-on sex is inherently tied to patriarchy.^[14] Sex columnist Karley Sciortino shares that, in discourse with female friends who enjoy pegging, she found that they separate politics from sex, even if it deviates from feminism or tends toward patriarchy. One friend described the experience as "fun and powerful", ironically calling it "Freudian bullshit". Another sees it as a "therapeutic tool" for empowerment. Though Sciortino holds opposing views, she concludes that if the aim of sex is intimacy and pleasure, perhaps politics should be set aside.^[15]

In 2016, Tom Ford stated that "all men should be penetrated at some point", as he believes it would help them "understand and appreciate" women by experiencing the "invasion" involved in being in a "vulnerable" and "passive" position.^[16] Similarly, Kate Lister has expressed that "all men should be penetrated at least once", suggesting that it could "challenge toxic masculinity and heteronormativity" and ultimately "make the world a better place".^[17] Tristan Taormino, describing pegging as "revolutionary" and a form of "sexual liberation", maintains that all straight men "must try it at least once".^[18] Erika Lust likewise emphasized that "every girl" and "every man" should "get to enjoy" pegging without "feeling bad".^[19] Supporting the practice, Justin Myers remarked that pegging can help deconstruct the "male ego".^[20] In 2018, Eric Anderson predicted that the popularity of pegging would rise, noting that "despite what the term 'toxic masculinity' implies, men are becoming softer", which links to "decreasing homophobia and homohysteria". Reflecting on generational changes, Justin Lehmiller observed that the growing references to pegging in popular culture "reflects a deeper societal change", adding that the "decoupling of anal sex and homosexuality is, in some ways, a symptom of a broader decline in sexual conservatism".^[21]

In culture

According to Beckett and Miller (2022), most popular representations of pegging are derogatory, negative or even amount to sexual assault.^[22]

Marquis de Sade describes a pegging act in his 1795 book Philosophy in the Bedroom.^[23][24] There is a depiction of pegging in the William S. Burroughs 1959 novel Naked Lunch. The dildo used is called a Steely Dan III, and is the source from which the musical group Steely Dan takes its name.^[25][26] The 1970 film Myra Breckinridge depicted a pegging scene where Myra rapes a man with a strap-on dildo.^[27][28] The first explicit pegging scene is believed to be the 1976 pornographic film The Opening of Misty Beethoven.^[29] Bend Over Boyfriend (1998) is based on lectures and workshops by Robert Lawrence and Carol Queen. Bend Over Boyfriend inspired Dan Savage to call the act "BOBing" but his readers subsequently voted on the winning term "pegging" in a 2001 contest and the term has since entered the English lexicon.^[29]

Since the coinage of "pegging", it was featured in the TV show Weeds, on the episode "Crush Girl Love Panic" (2006).^[29] Here, pegging appears to be non-consensual and is played as a joke towards the male character being forced into anal sex.^[22] In the episode "Knockoffs" of the sitcom Broad City, Abbi (Abbi Jacobson) turns to friends and family for advice regarding Jeremy's request for pegging.^[30][31] In the 2016 film Deadpool, Wade is pegged by his girlfriend Vanessa, commemorating International Women's Day.^[32] In François Ozon's 2017 film Double Lover, Chloé pegs Paul. Ozon stated that this scene, where the woman penetrates the man, "aligns with the feminist film that I advocate for".^[33][34] At the Met Gala 2021, Cara Delevingne wore a vest printed with the slogan "Peg the Patriarchy", garnering media attention. She said: "It's about women empowerment, gender equality—it’s a bit like, 'stick it to the man'".^[35]